And then there was....silence

Something about my life is really strange...you'd think that I would be the one to know what was going on, but right when I figure it out, it goes and pulls a complete 180 on me and I'm all confused again. For instance, take the last week:

So, there's this guy I really like. I was pretty sure he was feelin' it too, but here lately, I'm just not getting the vibes. But that's cool, cause everyone knows that despite my boy craziness, I am not looking for a relationship, much less do I need one. So his apparent lack of interest at the moment could be for the best.

But, then, the plot thickens.

There's a guy from the past who shows up Tuesday. Well, I say he showed up, but he's been calling for a few weeks wanting to come see me. Anyway, this guy, we'll call him "the Baritone", apologizes for everything he's ever done (and if you know anything about the past year, you know what I mean) and tells me that he'll do anything to regain my trust and be with me. I tell him that I don't think I can trust him...but I might be willing to give him a chance. Well, he comes over with some other friends last night to eat the food I cooked and play some poker (which I won and took everyone's chips!!! bwahaha!!!) and afterward, we went outside to talk. Well, after much deliberation, I came to a very sudden conclusion: there is nothing he could do to make me trust him. At least, nothing I know of. And me liking someone else, even if I don't do anything about it ever, is still not fair to him. So, mostly because of the trust issue, I told him I couldn't do it, I couldn't let him persue me. Then he tells me that he understands, and I'm making a mature decision....oh, but there's more:

Then he tells me that he loves me.

So yeah, that had a bit of an effect on me, considering I haven't heard that from a guy in a long long time, and I certainly have never heard anything of the sort from him. But, to me, that's not enough. How do I know that's not just another lie?

So things were pretty much swimming around in my head last night...just a lot of interesting stuff going on up there.

As for today, I'm fine. I really think so. You know why? Because:

1) This morning Clay had an exclusive interview that I set up all by myself. Norma McCorvey, formerly Jane Roe of the historic Roe v. Wade, was on during the 8 o'clock hour of the show. She has since become pro-life and is fighting to get the verdict overturned and outlaw abortion. It was an absolutely amazing interview, and she was such a sweet lady! I've got to send her a thankyou card. www.roenomore.com

2) Right now, I'm running the board on Rock 93.7, something I've been wanting to do. I also talked to Jeff today, and he's going to get me started voicetracking on B103, which means I'll actually be on an FM station! Woohoo! Also, he seemed as though he liked the idea of me one day hosting my own show on WIBR if I can get a sponsor and of course, make some money. So, that's looking up. http://www.rock937.com, http://1300wibr.com, http://b103.fm

3) Tonight I get to SWING DANCE!!! Yuh. Nuff said.

Alright, g/g do important stuff. Like push buttons and record JJ's remote...you know, he's really starting to grow on me. I don't even mind him calling me cupcake...okay, at least not as much. Haha. Peace yo.